Vanice

Intimacy, Bonds, Pain, & Pleasure

August 7, 2022

In the evenings right now, Venus, Sun, and Descendent meet up and bring some clarity in the realm of personal relationships, deep bonds, and intimacy. Taken into consideration with outer planetary nodes, we gain insight into hard truths about and great possibilities for our human experience.

What This Means For You

You may be feeling a bit adventurous and looking for ways to broaden your experience of life. As new ideas enter your field of awareness right now, it’s very important to welcome them and take a little time to reflect in an objective way. Perhaps a new direction is just what you need to find more of the enjoyable in your daily living.

Life is full of paradoxes and the other side of pleasure is pain. At the same time your struggles, difficulties, or losses pierce you with agony, your successes, contentments, and wins saturate you with joy. You can and will have both and that’s okay. Allow it all in and truly experience the full spectrum. Pain and pleasure are your lifelong companions so it’s a good idea to befriend both.

How I’m Feeling It

Collectively we try to structure and scrutinize our intimate relationships. We fall into the traps of labels and shoulds. We compare our own needs and desires for intimate partnerships with the imposed external power structure’s ideas of what these very personal bonds look and feel like.

Trying to fit our inherent knowings of who we are in intimate exchanges into those false ideas has distorted our experience of essential life-giving relationships.

Some of us subconsciously believe we deserve pain. Over and over we place ourselves in relationships that belittle and demean us. We give our agency away to a partner who controls, manipulates, and exacerbates our deep seated fears.

Some of us subconsciously believe we need to cause pain. Over and over we seriously hurt the ones we care about to avoid the closeness we want yet fear. We take from others and give very little, holding ourselves away from the experience of true intimacy as a way of trying to avoid our own pain.

Some of us do both.

At the core of it all is fear. Whether we fear being alone, being unloveable, being rejected, or having all of our hidden secrets and vulnerabilities exposed, it all plays out in a way that prevents us from stepping into a truly fulfilling intimate bond that is our natural way of being.

Intimate expressions in a relational bond can be easy and joyful. The complications we experience can be replaced by simple, sweet kindness. Our partnerships can be a source of relaxation and vibrancy. We can experience all of that when we acknowledge our pains and hurts, courageously reveal them to others who are willing to do the same, and step forward together into an original paradigm, a fresh pattern, a co-created reality of kindness, compassion, and acceptance.

We then begin to swim in the ocean of fears, traumas, desires, and yearnings instead of drowning. We immerse ourselves into a fuller experience of life, seeing pain and pleasure as aspects of being alive instead of identities. Together, we grow in recognition of each other and ourselves as we enfold everything into this mysterious adventure of living.

Secrets, Needs, Relationships & Nurturing

July 28, 2022

Sunrise, the beginning of the astrological day, held an overwhelming amount of Cancerian energy today. The new moon, mercury, and the sun all pulse here sharing a wisdom both necessary and difficult.

What This Means For You

Your emotions can be very intense today especially around any losses or sorrows you’ve experienced. Some of your inner hidden areas and secrets can call to you asking for acknowledgement and to be seen fully.

You can feel drawn to share with someone who helps you meet your needs yet a fear of opening a door that can never be closed holds you back.

All of this may feel so uncontrollable that you try to ignore it. Overindulging in your usual habits and rebelling against those deep emotional callings will only delay your personal evolution and inflict more pain.

How I’m Feeling It

As a collective we’ve all ignored or dissociated from our inherent needs. Shame and guilt in relation to the natural human condition pervades our lives. We suppress our innate necessities and they end up resurfacing in distorted ways.

Unsuitable relationships with demeaning power dynamics show up in all areas of our lives from family and food to sex and the earth. Even our relationship with ourselves isn’t immune to the strife.

We feel this heavy weight and assume there’s no way out from under it. We resign ourselves to being slowly crushed, disheartened, and denied the nurturing we crave.

Facing our personal experience of this aspect of the collective human consciousness is the way through. We can all learn how to lift the pressure, straighten our spines, and find a way to feed our raw hearts.

An exploration of astrological insights unique to each of us provides a map for exploring all phases of this evolutionary journey.

Autonomy, Wisdom, Power & Laws

July 26, 2022

Jupiter woke me this morning. So I got up and went outside at 430am to see what was up. I observed Jupiter in Pisces while knowing Neptune shares that place as well and saw three shooting stars between Aries and Pisces. Under all this, I felt the Moon in Gemini very strongly in my meditation.

What This Means For You

Feelings of confusion or self-doubt can come forth right now. There may even be a tug-of-war in the mind as you feel like you know what you want to be or need on one hand yet find all the reasons it won’t or can’t work on the other. Imposter syndrome, guilt, and shame can rear up too as feelings of inadequacy struggle against your dreams and inherent knowings.

All of these things can cause great mental anguish if you forget yourself even for a moment. And if you do, it’s okay. The feelings will change. Stay focused on the quiet wisdom expanding and calling from the depths of your creative center. Remind yourself of your life experiences because they build up your inner library of knowledge. Even the devastating painful parts of your life are welcome in this collection of information.

Instead of trying to let go or move on from the pain, feel it intensely. Invite it out to play and dream with you. Help your sorrow find a useful focal point to disperse it’s hard gained wisdom in a way that helps you see its value in your life and in your world.

How I’m Feeling It

I see the guilt many humans feel about the state of our world today. The discomfort we have while trying to maneuver all the human-made laws and attempts to control life. The struggles we each feel as we try to grow and thrive within outdated ideas and institutions of power. The shame that gnaws at us with the realization we gave away our own power to others who we believed knew better for us than the inherent voice of natural law.

It’s important we honestly acknowledge who and what we gave our power away to and start to reclaim it. From the medical system, religion, and schools to the ideas of biological families, careers, and gender roles (among many many other human-made laws of what life is supposed to look like), we’ve all given away a part of our greatness and autonomy to something unnatural and imposed. There are some small grains of truth within these various systems but they are not all-knowing or flawless by any measure. We need to sift out the seeds of nourishment and be rid of the hulls of falsehood.

Now is the time for us to look toward our inherent wisdom. The connection we have to the earth and many other heavenly bodies beyond plays out within our cells. We hold all the information and guidance we need within our physical being. Our lives don’t need any hand holding from external ideas of power. Our pain speaks of the places we fight against this truth. Our pain shows us a window into the depths of what we try to ignore. Our pain is key in helping us break out of our blind adherence. Our pain helps us find compassion for ourselves and other living beings as we navigate the perilous path toward greater freedom and unity within and with life itself.